User blog comment:XHAMADXGAMERX/Hail me bishes!!/@comment-31659649-20181209134710/@comment-29913108-20181211123342

What about this:

Case: The Murder Of Ambassador Patterson.

Victim: Douglas Patterson.

Killer: Amanda Love.

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Interrogation=

Jack: Amanda Love, we are he-

Amanda: Aw.....You don’t need to tell me...I already know what you came for....

Jack: R-Really...

Amanda: You want to f*** me....you know...you’re hot, and I won’t mind one more boyfriend, I already have many....

Jack: Y-You’re stunning too...B-but we’re here for something else...

Jack: We are here to inform you of the murder of Douglas Patterson.

Amanda: Yeah...Can you remind me what he is...I met many people in this apartment, many who I never heard of, or know their names....

Jack: He’s an ambassador..

Amanda: I met an ambassador..he argued with me and my boyfriend, Andy Mills...simply because we were loud in the bedroom...

Jack: T-thank you for informing us such...detailed information...a-and I’ll consider your offer...

Jack: She seems innocent enough... and y-yes you’re right, we need to speak to Andy Mills too....

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Arrest=

Jack: You’re under arrest for the murder of Ambassador Douglas!!

Amanda: Aw...how cute, you got jealous that you can’t have me for yourself, so now you’re accusing me of being a killer...

Jack: If you really aren’t the killer, explain why our killer’s right handed!

Amanda: Andy’s a righty too, and I bet you he loves me enough to kill Mr Patterson for disturbing our fun.

Jack: Well then..can you explain why our witnesses say the killer wears black..

Amanda: You know..you’re convincing me to show my black side to you...

Jack: But we already know how it looks, just admit it! We know the killer wears a fur scarf like yours!

Amanda:.....

Amanda: Fine I admit it! But he had it coming...

Jack: Why...because he disturbed your “fun”...

Amanda (dramatic): It’s even worse...

Jack: What did he do to you!

Amanda: HE ASKED ME TO SLEEP WITH HIM!

Jack: Did he perv on you....

Amanda: Not that I know of...

Amanda (dramatic): I mean can you believe it! An old, ugly man asking me out!

Amanda (crying): Thanks to him, now I feel insecure! I feel old and ugly, to think that I am capable to attract elders like him!

Jack:....

Jack: You know... ....Let’s arrest her already....

______

In trial=

Nigel: Miss Love, you’re here for the murder of Douglas Patterson, how do you plead...

Amanda: Innocent, what the victim did was WAY worse..

Nigel: Because he “destroyed” your self-esteem..

Amanda: EXACTLY!! Can you believe what a horrible person he is!

Nigel: Yeah....Forgive me if I don’t sympathize...

Nigel: For that...I hereby sentence you to 18 years in prison, court adjourned!!